How To Be A Good Diner

As some of you know, I currently work in a restaurant, and have worked in some form of service industry since I was 15. There are some things most people know about being a customer in a restaurant, but since most people in the world have not worked in some form of service industry, I want to empart upon you some tips. Here are some do's and don'ts that you might not really know about.

#1 - Tipping on a reduced check: Alright you pennypinchers, for those of you who can't afford things at 100% cost and use coupons, or those of you that complain enough to get a meal comped or some % off, what do you do when you tip the waiter? Say you had a 100 dollar meal and a 50 dollar gift certificate. Your waiter was fine, you think 15% is fine, so you tip...$7.50? Incorrect. Tip your waiter on the ORIGINAL bill. If I serve you 100 dollars worth of food, you should tip me on 100 dollars. Your waiter didn't give you 50% of his time, don't give him 50% of his tip.

I had a couple just this afternoon, each ordered a glass of wine, entree, very pleasant. They each had a 20 dollar coupon, so their 45 dollar meal came out to around $4.50. They left $6 dollars and left. To them I'm sure they thought they left a nice 30% tip. But in actuality, they left a 3% tip. Thanks for that ladies. Please never come back again.

#2 - Remember a % is a %, not a #: So this old adage of tipping %15 is a nice bar, but it's really a suggestion. You have to keep perspective about your bill, the amount of work the waiter does, how big a restaurant it is and how much of a pain in the ass you've been. Also, PLEASE don't be a smug tipper. If you go into a late night diner, say you're on a date and you order a couple of shakes and an order of fries. A $16 dollar bill, say you want to be impressive in front of your girl and leave a $20. Wow, look at you, that's a 25% tip. I tell you what, your date might be impressed, but the waiter or waitress just got $4 dollars. In reality, that's still $4. If you want to really leave a nice tip, think about quantitative numbers.

General rule of thumb I use, if it's just me at a diner and I want to be a nice person, I leave tips in 8-12 dollar increments. Regardless of your bill, keep in mind how much you're actually leaving.

On that same note, if there's 4 of you and you're in a nice place and you've been hanging around for an hour or so, tip well based on %s, not #s. $20 dollars may seem like a nice tip, but not when you've racked up a $140 bill and your waiter has prepared a nice birthday cake presentation and didn't get anything wrong.

#3 - Are you a person? So am I!: This one is sort of obvious, but you gotta remember it. Waiter, bus boys, hostesses, cooks, managers are all people. They have legs, eyes, ears just like you do. The bus boys have 2 hands and they aren't super heroes. They can only hold so much at once. Waiters have brains just like you do, we can forget things. I'm sure you've forgotten something before, so if your waiter forgets the ketchup or a refill of something, don't yell at them. Don't bring the manager over unless service was terrible. If the food was wrong, cold, had a hair in it and gave you food poisoning while in the restaurant, then complain. If you come during what appears to be a dinner rush and you feel like food is taking a while to get to your table...don't ask for 15% off.

#4 - Watch "Waiting": While it's not a perfect movie, and while I may love it more because of Ryan Reynolds, it is a great movie that gets some of the mentality about working in a restaurant. Take this movie into perspective. It's a comedy. It's surely based on true events. All of those characters, the principles and the customers, are all real and all exist.


These are just some things to keep in mind when dining. Nothing is set in stone. Each time you go out will be different. But keep some of these in the back of your head. For your sake and ours.